How to Write a Wedding Speech in 5 Steps

how to write a speech for a wedding in 5 easy steps

roberta burcheri events
Hey Roberta here! Founder of Roberta Burcheri Events, designer of soulful weddings and events in London, Italy and France

Writing a wedding speech is one of the most fun and heartfelt parts of a wedding, as are speeches and toasts.

At the same time, they could be some of the most cringe-worthy and unpleasant moments of a wedding. You know what I’m saying; let’s be real. 😉

If done well, it’s a rare opportunity for you both to convey what your connection means to the wedding guests, why they’re eager to celebrate your marriage, and to start the next chapter in your lives.

Here are some tips to help you nail a “killer” speech.

where to begin

Bride and groom hugging while listening to best man wedding speech with their groomsmen in the background toasting to the newlyweds during sunset

Writing a speech for a wedding is tricky because it’s hard to know where to start. If you can’t decide what stories to tell about your other half, start by making a list of your favorite things about them. Sit down together and collect your memories and big events together. How you met, courtship, first date, and the moment you realized they were the one It doesn’t have to be soppy; make it fun and dynamic, and play with your differences.

When it’s time to put pen to paper, this general outline can help you write a complete speech from beginning to end.

Hello and welcome!

2 blonde bridesmaids reading their a Wedding Speech holding a microphone and paper sheets, wearing a coral gown at an outdoor wedding in italy

Your speech tells a story, so structure it like one, with a beginning, middle, and end.

So firstly, introduce the topic, set up the theme, then support details through the paragraph, and the final part should tie everything together. Bookends are the best way to end a speech. When you make a clever, unexpected reference back to your initial phrase, you create speech magic.

Keep it Short and Sweet


You should wrap it up within five minutes. There is no need for lengthy remarks when it comes to wedding speeches. If you do the math, it’s easily going to be a 20-minute event for 3–4 different people. You could have a toast during cocktail hour, breaking traditions with an effective strategy to entertain your guests. Ever considered a joint wedding speech? It’s a great way of saying you’re a team, but don’t forget to get chopping. Joint speech doesn’t mean double the length.

best man holding a microphone during his wedding speech addressing the audience. In the background drums from the wedding banc
how to write a speech for a Wedding: The Best man speech

Leave your ex out. how to write a wedding speech without making any faux pas

Major. Cringe. Alert.

While witty anecdotes are a brilliant way to personalize a speech for a wedding, avoid any embarrassing stories (or mentions of ex-partners!) that may make anyone uncomfortable. Don’t let the mess get out of hand. It’s pretty self-explanatory, but I’ve seen it happen once, and let’s say it was not received well. A 50/50 sweet/humorous ratio is perfect.

Thank you and Toast

As you wrap up your speech, don’t forget to express your gratitude to the amazing wedding party. Let them know how much they mean to you and how they have contributed to making your day truly special. Remember, it’s all about spreading love and appreciation! Special thanks to those who helped make your wedding day possible or the ones who traveled.

bride toasting a her new husband's wedding speech

Public speaking can be super nerve-wracking, especially when it comes to giving a wedding speech.

Once you’ve written your speech, take the time to rehearse it until you feel totally comfortable and confident delivering it on the big day. Trust me, the more you practice, the easier it will be to overcome those pre-speech jitters and really shine in front of your audience.

Use notecards as a guide, but don’t feel like you have to stick to them word for word. Instead, give in to the experience and savor every second of it.

top image credit Studio fotografico Di Stefano

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